Saturday, September 29, 2007

6 months!

i can't believe it. she's rolling like crazy and jumping and babbling. she is always smiling and laughing. how blessed we are!

Friday, September 28, 2007


today is payday, people.


and i ain't talking about the kind with peanuts. kisu's first payday in months. he stopped working almost a year ago to attend classes with to get his MCSE.

he doesn't have the full MCSE yet, but he is employed in IT and that's what matters. the classes run for 6 months, but you schedule your 7 certifications independently to actually earn your alphabet soup. kisu hasn't had much time to study and test since he has been a stay-at-home dad since he stopped working.

i promised to tell about his job. he's working for an IT company locally, working on a tech support account for a major food chain. he is just finishing up 3 weeks of training, with both his actual employer and their client. they had to learn how to run the food operation front to back, so as to be better able to troubleshoot when things go wrong. their software controls everything from inventory to payroll to taking orders.

so far he is loving it, and feeling loved. the only drawback yet is that the client's training staff keep bringing in 'their' food for lunch and kisu is now mighty tired of it--not to mention off his plan. (not too far, and next week he goes back to brown bagging, so to speak.) he was told this week that he will be fast-tracked, and that made him feel even more loved.

his experience is that the company has a similar atmosphere and work/fun ethic to where i work. that is wonderful because i am so tired of him being jealous of the things we do at work. (have a sushi bar for ONE company event and you'll never hear the end of it.)

next week they go live. he's working 4 ten hour days, so he gets a 3 day weekend every week. that's one thing he can hold over me. until i tell him that his free day is gonna be spent taking care of the house.

Thursday, September 27, 2007

bocce bomb

we lost our tri-final match. to a wildcard team.

boo hoo.

although we were back on the court that loved us so well in our first match, we were unable to consistently deliver points. it was pretty disappointing, considering that the other team made it by virtue of the wildcard allowance. (i have no idea how they were chosen.) they didn't have any strategy at all! they simply walked up to the line and chucked a ball.

what a disgrace.

sorry clf, you were our designated charity.

i'm obviously going to have to institute an off-season training regimen.

brother, can you spare a dime ten bucks?

it's fundraising time again.

why is it that all the schools do their fundraising at the same time? and why do they all seem to be selling the same product?? (cookie dough, anyone?) one or the other thing should change, don't you think? that way, people can still support these causes without being buried by a deluge of dough.

in our house, at least, it takes awhile to empty one of those tubs (even longer now that we are on a campaign to eat less junk). i know they last longer in the freezer, but how many can you go through before the next year rolls around and you've got to buy more?

and of course you have to buy more. it's a case of you-scratch-my-back- i'll-scratch-yours. you're obligated to buy from your co-workers/neighbors because you want them to buy from you. and if you don't sell, your kid looks bad and the school/team doesn't get new books/toys/uniforms.

what happened to the days of the kids being responsible for hawking these goods, anyway? i remember going door to door in my neighborhood, begging the kindly old ladies to buy my ridiculously overpriced candy bars. sure, we used our parents workplaces, too, but we still had to pound some pavement for ourselves. (nowadays, it's all don't go knocking on doors, they might snatch you and lock you up in their basement and force you to watch nicolas cage movies torture you.)

of course, the alternative is for the parents to just shell out the money directly to the school for the coveted goods. hmm, no thanks. i guess i'll continue to spread the burden cookie dough.

Wednesday, September 26, 2007


i didn't even know that was a word. cool.

our third match was against a team called 3 Citizens and a Brit. we thought about crying foul on a technicality, since their Brit didn't make the start of the match, but he eventually showed up claiming he had been at a client meeting. whatever. with a $500 pot on the line, you have to get your priorities straight.

We got off to a rough start, quickly falling behind 5-0. We struggled throughout the match to regain the sure-handedness that had steered us so finely through our previous games. The course was wet and played to our opponents’ style of play: backhanded bombs that soar and then plummet to an exact location. Our team uses a bowling technique that relies on predictable dry ground.

It was a see-saw battle, with neither team being able to score max points in any end. We eked out a measly single point almost every time.

Finally, our luck seemed to change. With the score sitting at 18-12, we went on a crawl run that culminated in our eventual victory. I had joked that as soon as we took a lead, however small, we would conveniently call the game due to time limit. That turned out to be unnecessary.

I felt greatly redeemed for my abysmal play when I was able to secure the winning point. It was my turn to throw the pallina (?) and then the first bocce. The other team was unable to land any closer than I had, and so my teammates didn’t even have to throw.

Phew. What a nail-biter.

Tuesday, September 25, 2007

roll the balls

our company is having their second annual bocce charity challenge.

last year i participated but my team didn't do very well. none of us were very experienced, in fact, 2 of us had never played before. then one of our team members went on vacation the week of the tournament and we had to use an alternate. although we only won one match, we had a great time.

this year, we tried to go with the same team, but again had a personnel issue. our alternate from last year had an injury, so we had to get an alternate-alternate. (the guy we originally tried to use last year was on vacation again.) i talked to one person, another team mate recruited a different person. even though i'm the captain, i deferred to the other choice because he's a higher ranking person in the company. when we left for our first match, he got called back by his boss, so we went with my choice anyway.

our first match was a cake walk. even though we were rusty, we came out with some good plays. the other team clearly was not taking this match seriously. they were out to have a good time away from their desks. we got out to an early lead and never looked back. we won 21-5.

our next match was the following day. it was a bit of a grudge match against another team from our floor. normally we'd be friends with these guys, but this is a competition. we played it cool, very nonchalant, while they were comically aggressive, performing leaping chest bumps in an asinine display of testosterone. it was a see-saw battle all the way through but we finally pulled it out at the end of a sweltering hour. 21-19 was the final score.

Monday, September 24, 2007

the reckoning

i had a feeling that pooka was going to be in for some adjustment at school. i thought it happened last week.

when we came into the school, lisa* and john were sitting at the table. john said, "beth isn't here today." (i had seen beth duck under the table a second before.) pooka found her immediately and thought she was playing hide-n-seek. beth popped up and groaned. lisa and john said, "beth doesn't want to play with you today." pooka said, "is that true, beth?" there was confusion in her voice.

beth said, "i have to play with you everyday!" pooka was a bit flustered so i shooed her downstairs to put her stuff away. i heard the kids still talking behind us as the other two declared that they weren't going to play with pooka, either.

it just about broke my heart. i know she's bossy, and i can see the potential for her to become a bully because of her size and intelligence. but she craves playmates so desperately after the long isolation she's endured. i began to think that her conflicts with emily at school arose because emily stood up to pooka and wouldn't do as she was told.

i felt like shit that i secretly had such a bad image of my daughter that i would side against her in my mind.

that morning, i told pooka that she had to let the kids play with other kids sometimes. if beth didn't want to play with her, to leave her alone and not pester her, to find another playmate.

i burned inside the whole way to work.

it's obvious that pooka has inherited kisu's commanding social presence and ease in a crowd; she certainly enjoys being the center of attention. occasionally, she shows a bit of my shyness and, unfortunately, i think she also got from me the desperate desire to have friends, and to be wanted as a friend. i think that this could be a dangerous combination and might lead to bullying and/or sycophancy.

my wish for her is to be a good friend, to have friends, but not to need friends. i want her to be comfortable with herself so that she can endure being alone and not be lonely. i don't WANT her to be alone, but to be able to handle it when it happens. instead of, like me, creating a false insouciance and just pretending to like being alone.

ideally she'll have a small core of tight-knit friends that she can rely on for the rest of her life, as well as the ability to quickly turn strangers into amiable acquaintances.

i followed up with her teachers to see how she was adjusting socially and to see if my shameful vision of her behavior was accurate. to my great relief, and continuing guilt, it was not. diane said that pooka has been very helpful (both to the teachers and to her fellow students), very friendly, and overall very kind, although she is a bit bossy. sadly, though, it seems as if the whole class is plagued with snarky, petty, catty behavior. i suppose it's not too surprising, given that it contains 7 girls and only 3 boys.

oh, and for the record, beth ended up changing her mind and playing with pooka that day after all.

*all names were changed to protect the "innocent" little monsters.

Sunday, September 23, 2007

the legion of super...insects

pooka made a ladybug mask at the last camp casey. she put a giant brown pompom on it. she got mad at us when we starting telling 'mole' jokes ala austin powers.

today she put it on and gave her evil laugh. (have i mentioned that she routinely practices this?)

muah, hah, hah.

"are you afraid of me?"

"of a ladybug? i don't think so."

"but i'm an evil ladybug."

miss redford usa or how i learned to tolerate a beauty pageant

we had quite the busy day saturday. first we had a baby shower for noel and nancy. from there, the girls and i went straight out to port huron to meet up with molly and crew from camp casey. we were being treated to a girls' night out to support miss angel (a camp counselor) in her bid to become miss michigan usa 2008.

i should have known better than to head out for such a girly-girl event.

to begin with we left the shower later than we should have. i made the wrong turns to get back to the freeway and took at least twice as long as it should have. so we had 20 minutes to travel 63 miles. (i speed, yes, but i don't go that fast!) then i discovered that a large portion of our route would be reduced to one lane.

i had a mini-meltdown. after giving pooka a hard time about reneging on a commitment, i was going to make her miss the event. and it was so late that even if i turned around immediately, we wouldn't make the birthday party, either.

i pulled myself together, resolving that we would have a good time, one way or another. either we would catch up with the group later in the itinerary or we would find my friend who lives in port huron and just hang out and have fun. this resolution was tested again as i missed my exit and had to explore my way to the meeting spot. fortunately, both times i had previously been in port huron were in the same vicinity as our destination, and i did find it.

we arrived at the meeting place just as the group was about to leave. i made pooka strip and put on her 'theatre' wear and we all piled into the limo. we went to the salon (about 4 blocks away), which was reserved for the girls' special night. they got their makeup and nails done, and got their hair styled. they also made signs showing off their support for miss angel. the salon gave each of the girls swag bags, as did camp casey. tiaras and sashes proclaiming each girl to be 'camp casey's angels' were donned. one girl celebrated her birthday saturday and she got even more special treatment. she was dressed as cinderella, complete with glass (ok, plastic) slippers and silver gloves. her toenails were painted as well as fingernails.

the limo took us over to the bluewater bridge for some photo ops, and then we returned to the pizza place for dinner. the girls were so excited to find we had a room all to ourselves with a tv which they controlled! we had salad, pizza, breadsticks, and an impromptu birthday cake. then we were off to the theatre for the pageant.

we had talked about walking, but by the time i was ready to leave, my walking partners had already left--in their cars! so i put my girls in the truck and headed down to the event. i lost sight of our group as i parked and hurried to the building to catch up. wouldn't you know, i was at the wrong entrance and had to lug the baby carrier all the way around the building. i was sweating by the time we found molly with the tickets. we headed upstairs and found seats just as the excitement was starting.

there were 62 representatives from all around the state of michigan. i don't know how they divided them up because some represented cities, others counties, and still others regions. for example: there was a detroit, a motor city, an oakland county, and an east michigan (she was the eventual winner). after the girls introduced themselves, there was an elimination. our sponsor did not make the semifinals. our night was basically done. we only got the chance to wave our signs once. i wanted to leave at that point, since i had no desire to watch a beauty pageant for no reason. when the girls came out in their bikinis, i actually felt a little queasy. it struck me then that i probably shouldn't have brought pooka to an event that seems so shallow and vain, but i did it for the experience. i don't regret it, but i do regret having to sit through the rest of the show.

i tried, i really did, to be respectful and not taint pooka's perception of what was going on. but there was only so much i could take, and after the intermission, my veneer began to crack and my natural snark and intolerance leaked out. fortunately, the woman i was sitting next to held a similar opinion and we got catty together. by the time the 5 finalists answered their 'final question' s, i had pretty much lost all semblence of mercy for these female objects and was outright laughing. asked how she felt after receiving her crown, the winner responded, "out of all the experiences in my life, i have experienced all of them up to this point, and this is the best so far." i buried my head in my hands to stifle my derisive snorts.

there was much hoopla and greetings with miss angel after the show. i was dreading the long drive home. i anticipated that we would get home around 1230. to cap off the evening, as i was headed to the parking lot (i had left the girls with the rest of the group and was going to drive around to pick them up--i was tired of lugging the baby carrier all over God's creation) i was nearly STRUCK by a car! the guy didn't look left as he exited the parking lot. if i hadn't jumped when i did, he'd have run over my leg or more. he wasn't going fast, but i bet it still would have hurt.

i called kisu as soon as i got on the road for home. i was afraid that i would doze off, so we talked the whole way back. it only took about an hour and twenty minutes, but it was still after midnight. we put the girls to bed and i crashed. i was in desperate need of my 'beauty' sleep.

Friday, September 21, 2007


after having such a quiet social calendar, it's getting crazy for pooka. we have the camp casey pageant event this saturday after the baby shower for noel and nancy. sunday we have tickets from make-a-wish for the tigers game. now pooka has an invitation to a schoolmate's birthday party for saturday, as well.

we tried to explain to her that a) the pageant was a rarer event and b) we already rsvp'd for the pageant, and we would be taking a spot that another little girl could have filled. she still wanted to go to the party. so i was weak, because i didn't want to drive all the way to port huron and back so late. i called the party mom and said we would be there. it was a rock and a hard place for me because i didn't particularly want to go to another princess party, either.

tonight, pooka decided she wanted to go to the pageant after all. (i had never told them we wouldn't be going. not out of any motherly prescience, but out of wanting to avoid their disappointment.) i decided that although i had been delinquent in my parental duties in the first place allowing this situation to get so muddy, i could make a good example of standing up, taking responsibility, and trying to clear it up. with pooka listening, i called the party mom and told her the whole story. she was very understanding and hoped that we could get together another time.

problem solved. hopefully pooka learned from my example.

sorry, pachelbel

i feel i have lots of things i meant to post this week, but now that i have a free moment i can't remember them (reference reason for blog).

but i just saw this video on poot and cubby and i LOVE it. i want to share it with both all of my friends who read this.

Tuesday, September 18, 2007

bronze or lace?

today is our 8th wedding anniversary. it's also the 12th anniversary of when we moved in (to my college dorm room) together. it's also the 13th anniversary of our first date. (we wanted to minimize the number of dates to remember. )

we made the decision to get married a scant 6 weeks into our relationship. some people saw immediately that we were a perfect fit, some thought it a bit rushed. it took 5 years to get married, i don't think it was all that rushed.

we make a very good team, in our own humble opinions. we have many common interests and some separate interests for when we need space. each of us even has some understanding of those separate interests so that we don't have to feel alienated at any time.

we have complementary strengths and weakness that ensure our house and family are pretty well taken care of. it's most noticeable when dealing with the kids. when one of us is just about to snap out of patience, the other one steps in and resolves the situation. (it's also apparent in the kitchen: he is an excellent cook and i can wash some mean dishes.) that symmetry came in very handy when we faced the biggest challenge of our lives, single or married. it's the kind of challenge that can either galvanize a marriage or rip it apart. i think we belong in the former category.

we have our minor issues, which are greatly exacerbated by money troubles. for the most part, though, we are quite harmonius. i think that's why we feel like we've been together forever.

i love you, kisu. here's to the next 13 years.

p.s. the title refers to the traditional gifts for the 8th and 13th anniversaries, respectively. does anyone still adhere to that antiquated convention?

Monday, September 17, 2007

me x3

things come in threes. this seems true in a lot of instances, but, alas, not for people. that is, there is only one of you, or me. and that is becoming a problem.

at some point in the past, i made it known that i would like to help teach sunday school. as the new school year is upon us, i am suddenly in high demand. no fewer than, you guessed it, 3 people have called asking me to be a part time teacher. for different segments of sunday school. don't these people talk to each other?

another example:
bug has physical therapy wednesday mornings. this is a new, hopefully short-term, arrangement. pooka has clinic on wednesdays, but only once a month. this is a long-standing arrangement, although we hope it will be ending soon. next week, kindergarten has their first field trip (the annual excursion to the apple orchard).

i'm sure you see where this is going.

all three of the above named events are converging on wednesday, 9/26. kisu is still in training and can't take any time off yet.

i can't be in three places at once. i haven't gotten approval for the cloning yet, although i submitted my application several months ago.

solution: i moved clinic to the afternoon (the field trippers return at lunchtime) and recruited poppa to take pooka. i will take bug to therapy as usual.


one crisis averted, and with none of the mess that having clones can produce, like kisu wondering which mishu he slept with last night....

Sunday, September 16, 2007

dark portent?

what is this world coming to? the lions are 2-0. according to history, they now have a 67% chance of making the playoffs. gadzooks.

and the bills are 0-2. pfft.

Saturday, September 15, 2007

blue over green

michigan kicked some serious leprechaun butt yesterday. GO BLUE!

it's about time. now kisu might finally stop pouting. he's still begging for bill cowher to coach next year, though.

Friday, September 14, 2007

milk anxiety

tonight we are going out with noel and nancy to celebrate our anniversary. granny and poppa are picking up the girls from school and keeping them overnight.

they are taking almost my whole inventory of breastmilk for bug. i am very nervous that i won't be able to replace it. she has been doing very well with solids, so maybe we should increase them a little bit to decrease the hit to the inventory. i gave granny the ok to introduce mashed banana this weekend, in addition to the sweet potato.

i have been reading up on first foods and am pleased to see that i don't have to go the commercial food route. but that should be common sense: babies 100 years ago didn't get commercial baby food. but then i think: babies 100 years ago got exclusively breastmilk from their housebound moms. ah, the guilt.

i am pretty proud of myself for getting this far without needing formula. my goal with pooka was to get her (any) breastmilk until she turned 1. i limped along and barely made it. i don't actually have a set goal for bug, just: as long as i can. sometimes i think i'll stop soon, sometimes i see myself going for a lot longer. some days it's not my mind, but my body that wants to stop. (like last night when she bit the hell out of me.)

right now i am having trouble pumping milk for her to drink at daycare. i have plenty of milk when she's drinking direct, but i think i am becoming desensitized to the pump. it's very frustrating. the solids are really helping in that department. she's only eating ~2 oz (of solids, that is), but it seems to be just the right amount to supplement the bottles and get her through until i can nurse her.

she seems well satisfied and healthy. maybe i should just stop beating myself up about it.

Thursday, September 13, 2007

i crack me up

we have been blessed with two kids who have a sense of humor. a somewhat mystifiying sense of humor, but whatever.

bug just laughs and laughs for no reason. i was carrying her to the tub for a bath and she burst into these adorable little chuckles for no reason. hmm, maybe it was just because she was naked (our girls do like the buff).

she has impressed the people at daycare with her easy laughter. i think somewhere inside her head there's a gag reel on permanent loop.

last night she was laughing like a loon everytime she looked at pooka. pooka didn't even have to do anything, just look back at bug. she was cackling like a hyena. it was hilarious. her laughing made pooka and i laugh, so we were all sounding like maniacs.

pooka has a unique brand of knock-knock joke. um, i call it the 'that ain't funny' kind. but she doesn't care. she'll tell it over and over and be surprised that people still aren't getting it, but ultimately not care because she thinks it's hilarious, dammit.

i actually tried to explain it to her once. how knock-knock jokes are funny because they play on the sound of a word. i even gave her specific examples and highlighted the operative words. i think i even suprised myself with my own stick-in-the-mud-ishness. dissecting the mechanics of a knock-knock joke? seriously?

it's becoming increasingly apparent that i am too clinical for my own good. i need to lighten up.

but pooka's jokes still aren't funny.

Wednesday, September 12, 2007

video update

finally got the video posted for bug eating.

long distance dedication

andi over at poot and cubby made me remember how much i miss my sister.

damn her.

it is difficult to live across the country from your family. it's hard to know that your children won't spend much time with their aunts/uncles/cousins/grandparents. it's especially difficult if you grew up with an extended family that had get-togethers for every birthday/wedding/baptism/random reason. my generation has 16 cousins on my mom's side. even though our ages span some 17 years, we spent a lot of time together. it was great fun, and i'm sure very comforting to my parents to know that there were a whole host of people to watch over us if they were occupied, say, playing poker and drinking beer.

but being away from your sister, who was practically the focus of your whole childhood, is especially difficult. it separates you from a source of wisdom, joy, help, a shoulder to cry on, someone to pig out on ice cream with, to send you on a guilt trip, to welcome you home when it's over.

it's my fault, i suppose. i'm the one who moved away from our last common state of residence. (but, seriously, since she was always all about taking care of her baby sister, why didn't she follow me?)

this distance separates not only two sisters, but aunts, uncles, nieces, and nephews.

i was there when my nephew was born. i spent nearly his entire first 3 months with him. at this time i was already living up north for the school year and summering in florida. the next summer, when my first niece was born, i again spent most of my vacation with them. the next niece was born during the school year, so i didn't see her until she was almost a year old (and by that time i needed a job during the summer.) my exposure to those kids has decreased every year since. i want to know them, but they're already teenagers. i wasn't very good at being a teenager myself, i sure as hell don't know how to relate to one now. since i am the 'good sister', i mostly spend our conversations asking how school is going, and reminding them to be responsible. how boring is that? who wants an aunt like that?

on the flip side, my sister is the fun aunt. she gets silly. she gets on the floor and wrestles and tickles. she doesn't see my girls any more often than i see her kids, but she definitely makes the most of it.

hopefully, we will soon get our finances in order and we can take advantage of the low airfares you can sometimes find on short notice. i want to see a lot more of my sister again. and i want my girls to see her, too. we have such a good time together, when she's not torturing me.

Tuesday, September 11, 2007

in remembrance

6 years ago today, i was sitting at my desk, rubbing my gravid belly, postponing the start of my workday. it was with great skepticism that i heard someone exclaim that a plane had crashed into the World Trade Center. i called kisu at home to see if this was a hoax.

sadly, it was not. i spent the rest of the morning downstairs, in the bosses' private lounge, watching the horrific events unfold on tv.

i was worried. i worried for the people i knew living in new york. i worried for the people i didn't know living in new york. later i worried for the emergency responders in new york. i worried for the emergency responders not in new york, who were already mobilizing to help the stricken city in whatever ways they could.

i worried for my unborn child. what kind of world were we bringing her into? a world that could produce hate and contempt on such a grand scale. a world that contained people who so reviled other people that they were willing to sacrifice their own lives to bring about the death and downfall of those others.

6 years later and i still worry. it's not in the front of my mind all the time, but i still think of it. i pray for those who were lost during those attacks.

i pray that my children learn from those events, and the events that have followed. i pray that i can teach them tolerance for others, for our differences. i also pray that i can teach them to stand up for what's just, to be strong for themselves, and for others who lack the strength. i pray for them to be better people than i am.

pooka ballerina

for the past 2 years, pooka has been all over ballet. i don't know that she's ever seen it outside of 'angelina ballerina', but she wants it. she wants it bad.

if you ask her what she wants to be when she grows up, she'll say a ballerina. (i love my kid, she's wonderful and special, but a ballerina body she ain't got.) she won't even recognize the fact that you can have one thing as a hobby, and something else as a profession. of course, she's too young to need to know about JOBS that earn MONEY. i guess it's a good thing that she feels she can do something she (thinks she) loves all the time as an adult. that particularly mind-numbing reality can wait.

granny promised to enroll pooka in ballet lessons. pooka has been counting down the days until the first class. it was yesterday.

i haven't heard anything about it from pooka, since she got home just in time to go to bed, but i gather that she had a fabulous time. she started learning some stretches and mnemonic devices for the things she will regularly have to do in ballet. she can't wait for her next class. she has to wait ONE WHOLE WEEK.

Monday, September 10, 2007

bug's first day

today was bug's first day at daycare. i was a little nervous, but only as it concerned making sure they had everything they needed for her. i wasn't worried about being away from her, or how they would treat her. this is the same facility that took pooka at 7 months of age, and it's the exact same person, in fact.

of course they wanted an idea of what her typical day is. i had no idea! kisu is the one who knows those details. when she's with me, she obviously drinks straight from the tap, which directly affects the quantity/frequency of her eating and sleeping, as well. she's a pretty easygoing kid, though, so i trust that they'll figure it out. i gave them a rough guide and 3 bottles. i'm sure they'll be fine.


she slurped through all 3 bottles way too soon, slept a total of 50 minutes, and had a major blowout diaper. yeah, i'd say it was a lovely 8 hours.

honestly, the workers (what do you call a daycare person in shorthand? we usually say teacher.) said she was very good despite her hunger and laughed a lot. that's our typical bug.

Sunday, September 9, 2007

sweet potato bug

bug had her first official taste of solids this weekend. (as opposed to the unofficial tastes that my sister and parents keep sneaking into her mouth. such as: pancakes, chocolate, limes, guacamole, and pickles. nothing like freaking out a nascent palate.)

i would like to avoid the processed baby cereal and jarred foods if i can (but the current trend of my milk collection is not looking so good.)

in the vein of homemade baby food making, i boiled and mashed a sweet potato. (yes, i can boil water.)

bug took to it very quickly. she ate about 1 tablespoon on saturday and almost 2 tablespoons today. there was very little spillage, although today she managed to get a gob of it on her hand and spread it around before i caught her. i thought i wiped it all off, but pooka later pointed out that bug had sweet pota"toe"s. oops.

then pooka declared that they are obviously sisters, because, "we're both messy." hmm, well, that makes you related to just about all the babies on the planet....

it should be interesting to see what her diapers look like this week, although they already had a tendency to be orange...that will be something for the daycare providers to take care of because {drum roll, please} she starts tomorrow! (in case you're not following, that means kisu got a job! more on that later.)

Saturday, September 8, 2007

the dairy barn

pumping milk at work has not been a problem. until this week.

on two separate occasions, i had intruders. both of whom had projects for me. the first time i was able to put it off until the end of my session, but the second time i had to cut the session short, because they also needed to use the office for a conference call.

the first intruder was unflappable, as she is an old hand at motherhood. the second was a bit flustered and very apologetic for having to interrupt.


since jen has come back from maternity leave, she has adapted a (newly) vacant office on the other side of the floor to her purposes. i may have to start sharing with her, since my official location down on the 4th floor is going to be permanently occupied soon. the new space is ok, but i get a little jumpy since there is a lot of traffic right outside the door. jen papered over the window, but it still sounds like the door is opening constantly. not exactly conducive to the relaxed state i need in order to maximize my milk collection.

Friday, September 7, 2007

do i have to eat the worm?

we had a bunch of early birds this morning. i heard pooka's radio playing a little before 6. my alarm doesn't go off until 6:10, so i was not particularly happy about hearing her. then, of course, when 6:10 came around, i hit the snooze button. all this is not helping me achieve my goal of getting up early enough to not rush around and rudely hurry pooka to get ready. it will get worse next week when i have to gather up the goods for 2 kids.

usually bug goes back to sleep after the 630 feeding but today, she was wide awake. her schedule has been wacky since the therapy started. it doesn't look like she's working all that hard, but i guess her insides are really burning up the energy. she has been noticeably more tired. and yet, she was wide awake this morning.

there was even an early-rising bunny rabbit in the backyard, she got to eat a ripe tomato still on the vine, instead of the proverbial worm.


i knew it would come back to haunt us. apparently, granny and pooka had a 'discussion' about calling people crack-heads in public. at least it wasn't at sunday school.

Thursday, September 6, 2007

creative trance

i love to watch people create art. sketching, painting, hell, even coloring. it puts me into a zen-like trance. i could watch for hours. (come to think of it, watching other people do housework- like washing windows or vacuuming- also has that effect on me.) so stumbling onto this guy's website will pretty much guarantee that i will get no work done for the foreseeable future. it's awesome, and it makes my hands itch to create something of me own. of course, my stuff just looks like scribble.

i'm such a frustrated artist. when i walk into a craft store, it's hard to control myself. i want to buy everything and start a million projects. problem is, i never have a practical project to do. i don't want to do something just to have it laying around the house. sell it? pfft. my talent's not that great. and if i can't find a purpose to which the project can be put once completed, i can't justify spending the money on the supplies and tools.

so, for now i'll content myself with surfing youtube, looking for videos of other, talented people who have projects to complete and pictures to create. nirvana, here i come.

Wednesday, September 5, 2007

bug's therapy

we met with the physical therapist this morning. yvette is very nice, and bug took a liking to her.

after manipulating her joints a bit and getting her to turn, sit up, and roll over (it wasn't as much like dog training as it sounds), she told us that we can do a bunch of stuff at home, and it won't be long before bug's back on track.

according to yvette, the neck stiffness is not much of an issue itself, but it is a sign of disparity in the development of her trunk muscles. she definitely has a preference for using her left side. this shows up in the way she slumps, the way she rolls, the way she sits, and of course, the way she prefers to turn her head.

her assessment of the torticollis:
neck is mild
spine is mild plus

i don't know what 'mild plus' is, but she was very confident that bug's development can be corrected in short order through 'playtime with a purpose'.

we were given instruction sheets with information on ways to hold and move her to maximize her flexibility. the main key is variety; both kisu and i hold her mainly in our left arms, she's accustomed to that.

yvette herself is going to be working on more structural therapy. that is, she's going to try and reshape bug's head. by removing pressure. i don't know, it looked like yvette was putting additional pressure on bug's skull, but she said she was relieving pressure. ?? we'll see how that works. yvette did specify that she would prefer not to use a helmet. well, that makes 3 of us.

Tuesday, September 4, 2007

a retro look

yeah, i know the retro look is fashionable, and everything old is new again, but having the complexion of a 15 year old is not something i desire.

i have been having breakouts ever since bug was born. this last month has been particularly bad, with last week very bad. my chin was so inflamed it hurt when someone looked at me.

i read that it can be due in part to hormones, specifically the lack of estrogen. kind of like what happens when you take a lactation-safe birth control pill. thanks, kid.

anyway, the doctor diagnosed folliculitis and prescribed antibiotics. so, hopefully, in 10 days i'll be as good as, well, old.

Monday, September 3, 2007

labor day weekend

we had a very nice weekend. after doing quite a bit of housework on saturday, we took off sunday for the magees, a bbq, and swimming.

we had SO MUCH FOOD. it was all good. we did lots of swimming. pooka showed off to granny and poppa. she finally ditched the kickboard for quite a while. she is getting better and better. next summer she should have no trouble at all. at the end of the weekend she complained that her shoulders were sore from so much swimming.

she even started getting used to going under water. she's not clearing her nose under water, but she's stopped throwing tantrums over getting dunked. kisu told her that if she splashed/squirted him, he was going to dunk her. apparently her fear of submersion was not nearly as strong as her delight in getting him wet.

i got a little burn on my back, but not too bad. i was hoping to get some more color for the wedding, but that's probably so far away that it'll fade again anyway.

we finally came home from a weekend in adrian early enough to actually prepare for the day after. the girls got bathed, we made pooka's lunch, and got school clothes laid out. then we snuggled and went to bed. ahhhh.

Sunday, September 2, 2007

vote for me...and then leave me alone

as if being bossy wasn't bad enough...

i think pooka is destined to be a politician. she talks out of both sides of her mouth. one minute she says, "mommy, you're the best." and the next she sasses me and refuses to do anything i say.

she can be uber-polite, thanking kisu or i for the strangest things (usually well after the fact), like letting her pack her own lunch. but then she'll imperiously demand milk with dinner and not even say please.

when she says that i'm 'her best mommy' i ask, "why, then, don't you do what i tell you?"

she says, "sometimes you get on my nerves!"

likewise, i'm sure.

Saturday, September 1, 2007

wake up call

i love pooka. she and her sister are the center of my universe (or pretty damn close to it), but she has a harsh wake up call coming.

she sat at dinner telling us that michael said she's not a princess. but her other friends say she is. of course, they're princesses too. and sean is a prince.

apparently michael is a new kid who doesn't know the law of the land.

another day, she complained of a pre-schooler calling her a butt-head and saying she was a boy because she was wearing camo pants (they are pink ...)

so far her life has been a super love-fest. a mutual admiration society whose object of admiration is pooka. you know that ain't gonna last.

she is a very charming and charismatic child, but she can be a little bossy. ok, a lot bossy. she tends to see places she frequents as her domain and groups of people she sees regularly as her constituents. (i used to do that when i was younger, too.)

i want to save her from the hurt that will come when kids don't want to play with her because of her bossiness, but she has to learn that she doesn't run the universe. the only way to get that lesson through to her is to let the other kids show her. explaining it won't sink in.

i hope that she can get it and rebound quickly. she didn't have too much trouble finding friends to play with before the diagnosis. being away from her peers has really affected her personality. some facets developed in a positive way, and some not so much.