Sunday, December 16, 2007

i want my money back

Do-It-Yourself Home Surgery Kit

1 woman, full of machisma, too short on time off stubborn to see a licensed physician
1 cyst the size of a grapefruit ping pong ball
6 alcohol prep wipes
3 iodine prep wipe
1 can of spray lidocaine not given enough time to kick in
1 xacto knife
34 sheets of paper towel
1 toilet paper holder to crush while attempting to redirect the pain
1 poorly sound-proofed bathroom in which to scream
1 ruthlessly loving husband practicing his surgical skills

those ads on the backs of comic books are so misleading.